My Testimony
Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest.
Matthew 11:28
This time in Florida was good. I felt that I could do anything with Jesus, and it was true. I had more and more strength to fight the addiction. I was very busy every day. I went to NA meetings, read the Bible, and felt a growing need to share with others how good God is. My relationship with my mother and brother was improving. God was showing me that if He comes first, then everything else is in its right place.. I have experienced many miracles.
I overdosed once. I know these stories from the paramedic who was helping me. Someone called an ambulance. In these situations, paramedics give the drug addict a nasal spray called Narc-an. They try up to three times. If there is no reaction, the person is dead. In my case, after the third time, there was no reaction, but the rescuer felt that he was to give me an injection. He himself did not understand it. I got an injection and came to life. Only he told me that I was no longer breathing and my heart was not beating. I knew God was protecting and guarding me. I also knew that I had something else to do in this life.
I’ve always been fearless. Sometimes I told my mother that I was terrified that I was not afraid of anything in this world. The only thing I was afraid of was that after death I would go to eternal damnation and not live with Jesus. I loved him as a child for what he did for me. More than once I have said that I would like to hug him. I do not know where these desires in a child come from, but I was like that. God showed me that He is with me, in small and big things. It made me feel safe and trusted him. I’ve been clean for 5 months. Never before in 6 years, I have not managed to be clean even for a day, except for detox, of course. I felt it was not my strength, that it was strength from God (2 Corinthians 12:10).. I was enjoying this time. I cried for joy and thanked God. I never thought it would be real one day.
Me and my mommy.
She always supported and helped me.
When I was on the bottom she was the first to hold out helpful hands to me.
She shed a river of tears, said hundreds of prayers to God for protection and grace for me.
Today she is the one who made sure that the memory of me and my testimony would not pass away.
See you in Heaven, Mummy.
I am waiting and I miss you.
Beata